A CORKER OF A FINISH

There were a whole lot of things that had to happen wrong for us on Tuesday night to miss out on the playoffs. Most of those options involved backing into the final postseason slot because South Philly Tap would tame the Zoo, eliminating the only reasonable team with a chance to catch us. The rest of them involved the Art Museum, which was mathematically alive but needed to not only beat us, but beat us by at least seven runs.

The best option was to simply win the game in front of us and clinch it ourselves. Incredibly enough, we took that option with a crisp, efficient 7-1 win over the Arties. This was accomplished 15 minutes before they shook hands over there on Dairy 4, so we not only made the playoffs, we avoided the dreaded back-in.

For the second straight season, we will face the Franklin Institute in the opening one-and-done round of the playoffs. This would be a nice game to win, so very nice.

But before we get to that, let's get back to Tuesday and the complete game win twirled by Chris Yasiejko. Just twelve scattered hits in seven innings for Art, and zero for extra bases. Toss in an acrobatic rules-be-damned putout at the plate on a strike from left field by George Miller and you do have a complete game. Behind Chris was great defense, no stupid throws, no dropped balls, smart decisions. Brian Donlen and Julie Dubin particularly strong up the middle of the infield.

Offensively, we should have scored more, but got impatient at times. The game was a slim 3-1 lead for us after five innings. We scored our first four batters in the sixth inning to give Chris some breathing room and he faced just eight batters in the final two innings.

Tom Hickey had two hits and started the sixth-inning rally with a triple. George Miller was 3-for-3, all line drives, and he knocked in a pair of runs. Brian Donlen had two hits, and Mark Nevins had two RBIs on a triple that almost ended with Nevins being thrown out at home.

We only had 14 hits, and that won't be enough next week. But let's deal with that next week. For now, let's enjoy this week. If you like the pictures you see here, visit the user-friendly site where you can find this team's photographic blog history for the past two seasons.

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS PICTURE?

The correct answer is, of course, "Mark Nevins appears to be pitching in this picture." Very good, class. You all got it. Take a good look. You won't be seeing this again. Astute observers will also see Brian Donlen standing behind Nevins at shortstop. This is a place between the bases on the left side of the infield that Nevins likes to refer to as "second base." More on that later.

A good win Monday night over a somewhat dispirited, but game National Constitution Center team, which was reminded that actually playing is a lot more fun than forfeiting. We win 12-2, easing past without being dopes about it. (Actually, the general manager thinks there was too much sportsmanship involved, but he says that at steel-cage wrestling matches, too.

We got terrific play at third base from Ed Cascarella, three solid at-bats from commissioner Ron

Goldwyn and pretty tight defense all around. Chris Yasiejko was the starter and winning pitcher, holding NCC scoreless on just six hits over the first four innings.

Nevins gave up two runs in the fifth, which he claims are unearned, thus preserving his perfect mark. Well, the book disagrees. There was a spritely 1-3 to start the innning, with Nevins correctly identifying first base and its guardian, Chris Brennan. Then there was a single, followed by another comebacker to the mound. The NCC runner was pretty fast and it would have been a close play at second, with Tom DiNardo coming over to accept the throw. However, we will never know how close, because Nevins chose to throw the ball to the shortstop, and not just to the shortstop, but behind him and into left field, allowing the runners to both move up to scoring position. The book insists that there was no routine play involved (no kidding?) and that the batter is given a hit, with the runners advancing on the E1. After a pop to Eddie for the second out, there followed a single and a double, making both runs EARNED. Decisions of the judges are final.

As indicated in the flimsy post below, we had 21 hits in 40 at-bats, pretty good raking, but will need to do better Tuesday against the Art Museum as we try to clinch the playoffs. Bad news is we're cutting it awfully close this season. Good news is Nevins won't be pitching.

A HARDY CONSTITUTION

There's something wrong with Mr. Blogspot tonight. He won't let us upload any pictures. That will be remedied as soon as he feels better, maybe tomorrow morning. Without proper inspiration, I can't do justice to Monday's 12-2 win over NCC.
It's like a bad tequila dream, in some ways. Did Nevins really pitch? Hoo boy.
We took care of business in this one, getting ready for the Arties on Tuesday night. If we win, we clinch.
Kerry O'Connor was 4-for-4 against the Constitutionalists, three hits for Chris Brennan, Brian Donlen and Jon Snyder.
Star of the game honors to Ed Cascarella for stellar play at third base and an RBI in our four-run first inning. We got up early 7-0, coasted a while, scored five in the sixth to close things out. I could say a few things about Brennan running through a "go" sign and Nevins throwing the ball into left field, but that would be churlish. Good fielding, for the most part, and sensational beer drinking. Not necessarily in that order.

THE MOOKIE SITUATION

All right, this isn't easy to talk about, but I keep all sorts of stats. My wife is in Europe for five weeks, so I've got some time on my hands. Some of it I spend in the hallway of the Marriott Marquis, some of it I spend poring over our statistics, looking for answers.

George, I'm sorry. Mookie is 1-6 this season. This week, no Mookie, two wins. Coincidence, or something more? You decide.

Now, I like Mookie, you like Mookie, we all like Mookie. But the Mookster's record sucks. I don't want to say he's not welcome. Who doesn't enjoy seeing him get after that darn frisbee? But 1-6 is 1-6. Next week, when we can clinch or be clinched, please make the proper decision on his attendance. Licking one's nose is a fine talent -- always popular when meeting people in bars -- but this is the team we're talking about here.

Now, we win, we win, we win again, beating the Fighting Griffins of the Art Museum, 17-10, to even our record at 6-6. We trailed heading into the bottom of the fifth, 8-7, but rallied to score eight runs and never looked back. Well, maybe a little.

Mike Galan had another three hits, as did Tom Hickey and Mookie's dad. Kate Fagan smacked her way aboard in all three at-bats and scored three runs. Two hits, two runs for Chris Yasiejko and two trips around the bases for Ellen Kenney, who pulled off the rare make-them-think-you're-falling-at-third-then-get-up-when-they-look-somewhere-else-and-score ploy. Eddie Cascarella got one at-bat and cracked the ball solidly into left for a hit. Jon Snyder, two hits, two scores in two at-bats. John Hall, another hit in his farewell performance for the season. He's off to Hong Kong for the next month and, even by our rain-delay schedule, the league will be finished by then. Great season, John. Two hits for Tom DiNardo. I'm leaving out some details, probably, but here's the short version: we doinked around for a couple of innings, got behind, got annoyed with that, took control, finished well.

The big news, naturally, was the return of Brian Donlen (above), from Panama or whereever he went on his honeymoon. In fact, this blog was going to be titled, "The Newlywed Game," after he had two big hits in his first two at-bats. (And you wonder what I'm thinking about standing there staring at the clipboard.) Great return, though, even if his body clock hasn't fully adjusted to this lack of daytime beer. Mix in a 6-3 now and then.

So we even our record at 6-6, with games Monday (NCC) and Tuesday (Art) left on the schedule. The playoffs are in our future and Mookie might be in our past.

PLAYING CHESS WITH DEATH

And the dude has some nasty breath.
That's where we are, folks. Every game is a playoff game. We came into this week trailing (I mean, trailing) the Zoo for the fourth and final spot in the playoffs.
How did we respond?
We knocked off the first place team in the league, Bishop's Collar, by a 14-9 score.
What does that tell us, class? We can play with anyone and the season is just beginning.
Of course, that might be just one thing it tells us. But we simply can't know that yet. Hmmm. (I meant the whole chess thing to be a play off of Bishop's Collar, get it, Bishop's? But I couldn't figure out how to make it work. Sorry.)
Anyway, we win, 14-9, the first win for our Daily News/Pen & Pencil Club franchise since 2005 over the Philadelphia Business Journal/Bishop's Collar franchise.
The book was kept by Danny, so I'm a little light on stats. I do know that we trailed, 7-6, after two and, 9-7, after four. They don't score again and we add four in the fifth and three in the sixth to take control.
We beat the most fundamental team in the league by playing their game. We hit line drives for singles, mostly, and we played smart, efficient defense. That is how BC got into first, and it is the way to win in this league. There was not a single ball that gapped us or was hit over our heads. They played small-ball and we played it better.
Now, it must be admitted that the Collar seemed to be reaching some
sort of genetic wall during the game. Spence went out with a pulled something and then Money made his elbow the size of street lamp and, well, like we don't have complaints? Freaking Donlen schedules this frivolous thing during the season? Is that possible? And Clark doesn't schedule anything during the season?
Anyway, the book. What do I know? I know Mike Galan was 4-for-4, scored three runs, knocked in a bunch, and hit a double and a half in one at-bat. I know that Jon Snyder had a pair of hits and scored twice. I know that George Miller smoked a three-run home run to right in the sixth that probably won the game. T-o-r-i-g-h-t. You heard me. And, uh, they weren't expecting it.
I know that Nevins got aboard each time, but I can't tell if it was his fault. Dan Rubin and John Hall came off the bench for two hits each, and more toward the end of this sentence.
Beginning the new sentence, a shoutout to Julie Dugan for doing the 1st base thing, one thing you know is that lacrosse players can catch. Also, to Hickey/Yasiejko for splitting SS which was something like a quicksand. And, MVP, to Ellen Kenney for her foul pop catch in the sixth. Huge play.
What else? The book has few answers. The focus now is on "ART." Yes, Art. We have to beat them on Tuesday. If we don't, it will be very disappointing.
Go To Manager's Corner.

NEW ZOO REVUE

Loved that show. Great if you're stoned, although the hippo could be a little scary.

Apparently, we played as if altered against the Zoosters, losing 15-10. Sorry I missed it. Life intruded on softball once again.

GM Chris Brennan filed this one:

"Sports, and writing about sports, are often fraught with clichés. Some of them are even true. Today's cliché: We win or lose as a team. The P&P lost 15-10 as a team last night to an undermanned but determined bunch from the zoo. Every player, those who showed up and those who didn't, played a role. With only one woman on the field, we were forced to take an automatic out each time the top of the batting order came up. We were also limited to nine players in the field. This is no excuse, of course, since the Zoo had numbers problems of its own and only had nine players. They made the most of it, with three guys swatting long balls with runners on base. Our infield was porous and our outfield overworked. Our bats were uneven, starting the game OK but then going silent at clutch moments. The automatic out can't even be put to blame since it was only responsible for the ending of one inning. Now we're neck-and-neck for the fourth playoff spot with these Zoo people. Next week is a new week."

I'll let all of that lay where it is. Veterans will recall that we split with the Zoo last season as well and still made the playoffs. So, let's not panic until the order to panic is given. (See Manager's Corner.)

STORY TIME

I was in a meeting the other day and the guy in charge said, "We need more stories. We've got lots of articles, but we need more stories." This struck me as brilliant -- except on the off chance that I might have to produce some of them.

It got me to thinking, though. This blog, a wonderful repository of life as we know it, to be puzzled over by later lifeforms who study our ways and can't fathom the concept of no-umpire softball, has a lot of articles. But it doesn't have a lot of stories.

Just to prove I'm down with the concept, this week we get a story. (Oh, I know. Some of you tuned in because you wanted a recap of our game Tuesday against the Tap. No. Actually, you don't.)

Where was I? Ah, yes. The story.

The fellow whose picture graces the post is Dan Rubin, great writer, great softball player, great friend. For the purpose of the post, I will overlook the Northwestern cap. (Matheson sporting Big Ten rival Michigan.) At least it's not the goddam Red Sox hat again.

The last time the Pen & Pencil had a softball team, before it was reborn in 2007 from the ashes of the proud Daily News team, Dan Rubin and I were rookies on the squad. You want to know how long ago this was? Rubin looked like Axl Rose. Hair down to his ass. I kid you not.

Mike Sokolove was the pitcher. Sal Paolantonio was the left fielder. Bob Rosenthal was on the team, and Fred Mann and Bill Eddins and Mike Missanelli. Hell of a team, actually. We played in a league with roofers and plumbers and such on their fields way up on Ridge Pike. And, let me tell you, when you got into an argument with the roofers, it wasn't like having a piss-off with the Art Museum boys.

Anyway, that's a few seasons in the past and it's good to be out there every week (crises permitting) with all of you still wearing the spatula proudly. That's the end of the story.

Now... we sucked against the Tap. Lost 14-7. This one got away from us. We needed to play better defense and gave them too many extra outs. On the other side of the book, we stranded a zillion runners.

Bright spots? Ellen Kenney was not, in fact, paralyzed when third baseman Jeremy nailed her in the lower back on a play at first. He also played spoilsport by snagging an absolute smash line drive off the bat of Ellen on her next at-bat.

We did find a shortstop. Thank god Donlen is out of the country and can't read this. Tom Hickey said, "This space is mine," and it will be hard to get him out of there.

Let's see. George Miller hit a foul ball for a home run. Kate Fagan bunted for a hit. Well, it would have been a hit, except there's no bunting in the Center City Softball League. But it did wake them up for a time.

It didn't wake them up as much, of course, as when Commissioner/Savant/Keeper of Book Ron Goldwyn stopped the game to accuse the Tap of batting out of order. Like loudly. Like going over to their bench. Like a couple of minutes later saying, "My bad."

I don't have the book, but I think that's the inning they scored seven runs. If it isn't, it should be. Would make for a better story.